FishDreamer scribbles: Howard Dean for President!

Saturday, 24 January 2004

The Unexpected Weekend

Today is my brother's birthday. (Happy Birthday, Little Brother!) We made plans a month ago to go down and visit for this weekend, but yesterday we found out that since he starts his new job (hooray!) on Monday, he moved his plans to go snowboarding and isn't home this weekend. And I kind of got a little irritated, since we'd told him a month ago we were coming, but I got over myself. It's his birthday, and I myself abide 100 percent by the birthday rule. He wants to go snowboarding, that's what he gets to do. I can wait. I can visit some other time. I can send him a gift certificate instead of handing him cash. So I hope he's having the best birthday ever and that his new job goes fantastically well on Monday. Go little brother!

So we're sitting at home. It actually works out well that I'm home this weekend, because I've been feeling rather under the weather and as a result I have work to do today. I couldn't do it yesterday, hard as I tried. I had a nasty headache all afternoon, and a sore throat all day, and I couldn't concentrate on anything. So I've been sitting here at my desk since 11 this morning (or maybe it was 10, I don't actually remember) trying to write this thing. I've gotten started, and I will finish it today. Got that? Today!

Much later...

Okay, so I didn't quite finish, but I got enough pulled together to send it off with notes about to do items and what I couldn't figure out where to put in the thing. So I can relax now, with my chili-velveeta tortilla chip dip dinner in my belly along with a few beers. Mr D is off watching television again (the DVDs of the "Forever Knight" series, if anyone remembers those). I finished my book (Lamb by Christopher Moore), I donated to my candidate again (and boy did that feel good!), and I'm thinking of picking up a book to read for fun.

It's so pleasant to have this unexpected free time. Not because I never get any, but really because this time was already booked and now it's not. No one is expecting anything from me (with the slight exception of work, we'll see what I get back tomorrow), and I have no commitments. I'm thinking a nice trip to the library is in order tomorrow. I have a couple of books on hold, and I managed to borrow a few that are out of order (a sequel to a book I haven't read, and Volume IV of L.M. Montgomery's diaries instead of Volume I which is now waiting for me).

Say hello to the Queen of Parentheses. Sorry!

I am sitting back, listening to girl music, wondering about the state of things. Work has been invigorating this week, after that rocky start. I feel like I can make a difference, like what I do really helps, and like the Boss trusts me to know what to do. As long as I keep myself from getting all heady with power (and really, it does happen although not often and I find it embarrassing), I can help move things out of crisis and set the ground for good things. And that makes me really happy.

Before Christmas, it was looking kind of iffy. People were very unhappy, there was a lot of infighting to go with the heavy pressure and intense scrutiny. Now, a month later, I feel pretty confident that we can pull this off. I can't tell you how much I love being part of that kind of turnaround. It gives me such a feeling of accomplishment, because I helped fix something that was broken and made the lives of many people much better in the process. The team has been working so very hard, but without support it was just giving them stress piled on stress.

It's not changing the whole world, but it makes a good difference to a lot of people. And that makes me feel good.

As to the Girl Music: I have a playlist that's all women (or at least all women's voices, since I know some of the bands include men). It includes Atomic Kitten (of course!), Jewel, Garbage, Natacha Atlas, Liz Phair, Mai Kuraki, some Corrs, The Donnas (who rock!), Hoku, Kylie Minogue, Lisa Loeb, Loreena McKennit, Beth Hart, Milla, some Melissa Etheridge, No Doubt, Norah Jones, Belly, No Doubt, Shakira, Sleater-Kinney, tATu, and Vanessa Carlton. Sometimes I include Madonna, Christina Aguilera, and kd lang too. It really depends on my mood.

I'm still sort of embarrassed to admit that I like the new Jewel CD, which is silly given that I'm ready to profess my love for Atomic Kitten to anyone. And Hoku? Kylie Minogue? What's that about? I like real feeling, I like difficult women, and I absolutely love harmonies. A good beat and a catchy tune are not quite enough to catch me, there has to be more. I have to feel the singer in the song. I have to know there's passion along with the talent.

Yeah. I'm hopeless. And it's nearly 2 a.m., I think I'm going to go lie down and wait for sleep to claim me. Good-night, everyone!

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