FishDreamer scribbles: Seeking Serenity Online

Wednesday, 22 September 2004

Evil Moods

I am in the foulest mood possible today. I woke up cranky and it's only gotten worse since then. I hate everyone and I just want them all to go away and leave me alone.

Still in training, still barely keeping afloat, and still having trouble accessing work stuff either from the class or from home. And I can tell you where my bad mood started: Mr D started reading a book at 11 last night and wouldn't stop. I kicked him out some time after 1, and he came to bed some time after 2. I think he read the whole book. I got about four hours of sleep.

And I'm sad, I'm bitchy, I'm exhausted, I'm whiny, I'm cranky, I'm sleepy, I'm pouty. I haven't heard from Mr D all day, so possibly I pissed him off this morning when I snarled at him that no, I didn't just need coffee, I needed sleep. Maybe he's not bugging me while I'm in class. Maybe I'm just full of myself and he's really busy.

I just want to scream, cry, and sleep. I'm so tired I want to cry at everything.

And just the act of typing that up made me feel better. I'm still exhausted, but it's a few hours later and I'm much more cheerful.

We went through and did all of the quizzes from what we've covered and I know more than I think I do. I don't understand it very well, but the material is sinking in some. That also made me feel a little better.

I want a nap. And I want to stop having alarms and anxieties and I really, really, really want to stop hearing about the election. I want the stupid people who are calling me asking for my time and money to go away. Thought about putting a message on my answering machine that says "we're not democrats and we already know who we're voting for so go away," but I don't think it would make the slightest difference.

And please, Powers That Be, let the evil empire end right now. Don't make me face the real choice of having to emigrate to get away from the very real evil that we're facing. Stop it. Don't let it happen. Please?

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